Right now I'm in Turkey what the heck am I doing in Turkey? I've asked myself that every day since I've been here, which to be fair has only been 3 days. But for the past 3 days I've begun to be transformed into a nanny. Now let me explain something real quick. I came to Turkey to be an Au Pair and to teach english. Little did I know that when you become an Au Pair you lose your individuality. Your no longer a person, but an extension of the children. Wherever they run off too you follow. When addressed, its in the voice that one uses to speak to children, as if you don't understand normal conversation or are capable of discussing anything else but the child. And i'm sorry but contrary to popular belief just because i'm paid to look after your kid does not mean i am interested in how much they poop and how badly it smells.
Its an adjustment period these first few days. I'm glad i can say that at least I made it to June. its a new month which is good its a new beginning and i can only hope that because its june i will no longer be forced to play with barbies, after all we did that in may. I see no reason to repeat that ever again. But really i have no say in what games we play apparently i'm just another toy.
ahhh! i know exactly what you mean... trust me. its all i've done and all i do. but i promise if you look at it differently, as giving service.. yes forgetting yourself for however many hours of the day/evening, i promise you will see amazing transformations and blessings in your life. sounds cheesy, but if you put your whole heart into it and have a positive perspective and actually true to adjust and change a little just to be convenient for these kids and that crazy annoying family, YOU WILL GROW LEAPS AND RAINBOWS AND PLANETS BIG. i promise. it is worth every ounce of frustration, tears, wantingst-to-be-home... all of it. why do you think ive dedicated quite a few years, daily, nightly... to this. its worth it steph! i hope things get better.
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